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description=To speak the name of the dead is to make them live again ~Egyptian Tomb Inscription;

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Text of the page (random words):
our own creation to speak the name of the dead is to make them live again egyptian tomb inscription home ivf 2 photos quotes resources our own creation to speak the name of the dead is to make them live again egyptian tomb inscription feeds posts comments happy birthday to you january 3 2014 by a m s time flies six whole years we are happier than we could ever have imagined but oh how we miss you both we will blow out your birthday candles on cupcakes tonight wishing you could do it for yourselves we will hope that tonight isn t the night we have to figure out how to explain to miss moonpie why we celebrate a birthday today happy sixth birthday lennox maximilian and zoë harper we love you so very much and carry you with us posted in a life altered 3 comments please join us october 15 2013 by a m s there is no real ending it s just the place where you stop the story frank herbert it is time isn t it it feels right sad but right this space has served it s purpose now it can be like my copy of jane eyre sitting on the shelf held together with a rubber band the hardcover spine long gone more pages dog eared than not but always there if i need to pull it off and devour it all over again infertility is still a part of our lives but since i ve been told that getting pregnant would be a very bad idea and while we still have tot sicles it is unlikely we will have the financial or emotional means to tackle a gestational surrogacy infertility has become a footnote to my health the twins will always be with us i will always be in mourning and i still think of them every single day but i m not so much lost in the woods and i am just wandering across a neverending plain i can see others in the distance and sometimes even run into someone to talk to and i can feel the sun on my face and there is a nice breeze and even a few flowers it isn t so scary and dark and deep no one ever wrote a horror story about being lost on a plain i can live here so it s time to let this space become a fixed point and a reference instead of a living document we have a new adventure now s and i have been given this amazing opportunity to shepherd olivia moonpie through life and it is quite an experience and it is a responsibility we take very seriously we have documented the past three years with thousands of photos and videos and voice recordings because the smartphone is always close at hand and sometimes that s all the brain power and energy we have i m ready now to start documenting and remembering and recording a little differently i ve missed the words thank you for being a part of this endeavor when i started this blog so many years ago i had no idea where it would take me and i never imagined that so many of you would be a part of it i wish it hadn t fallen victim to my inability to do anything extra curricular the past three years but if i have learned one single lesson over the past seven years it is that life is what it is and you can sit and bitch about it or accept it deal with it and move on spilled milk y know those of you who are still reading here and those of you who used to and may someday check back and find this like a message in a bottle on the beach thank you you kept us going through some very dark days we don t forget so please join us at a good mother and help us as we guide olivia moonpie through the next few years and hopefully teaching her to be a compassionate funny curious self assured humanist in a world that doesn t always seem to value those characteristics a good mother it isn t what i claim to be it s what i m trying to become posted in a life altered 1 comment life moves on october 11 2013 by a m s tap tap tap ahem is this thing on i feel like i ve been living in a cave for three years and i m just stumbling out into the sunlight my eyes haven t adjusted to the brightness yet recently i read an article about living in the blur those days with a not a toddler when you feel like you ve grown a second not terribly evil but incredibly demanding head and you start to wonder if you will ever get to eat a meal while it s warm pee by yourself read a book sit down for a second have a conversation with someone who can actually pronounce their s s and go through a day without getting a body fluid on your clothes that isn t your own i almost cried because i realized that someone did get it and she was already on the other side it was sort of like that feeling of relief i felt when dr n gave me a diagnosis and a plan of attack because finally there was something concrete to go on and some reassurance that we would get through it just lately i ve started realizing that the wonderful olivia moonpie is starting to play on her own she s more potty trained than not and while i have to holp her she can usually get started on the process by herself i actually read a novel this past month and i didn t have to restart it five times because so much time elapsed between reading the first five pages and getting to pick it up again we are working on what it means when mommy closes the bathroom door thank you whoever invented locks because she just learned how a door knob works i can even say i m going to go take a shower while you finish your milk and watch max and ruby and she will finish her milk and watch tv while i shower she can come get me if she needs me now instead of my taking the world s fastest shower while constantly hollering are you ok i think i ve made it out of the blur and i have missed this i ve missed interacting with other grownups so much has changed in our lives in the past 12 months did you know we moved i hired a personal trainer olivia moonpie can ride a tricycle like a pro and she is learning to swim but this place was about getting here i m such a different person now it sort of feels like we wrote the final chapter on this particular book and it s time to put the pen down also i feel like this blog serves as a reference for those still struggling with infertility and infant loss i know when i was so deeply lost in that wood i didn t want to see new posts about trips to the children s museum and photos of birthday parties i have a question all the time we have people commenting on how awesome miss moonpie is how well behaved she is how smart how self assured they ask how we did it so i ve been tossing around the idea of starting my own mommy blog i know 2008 was a long time ago in internet years i m sometimes a slow adopter and sharing some of what we have learned these past three years and testing out theories as we go forward trying to raise a healthy happy girl in the age of twerking let s just say i m hoping malala makes more of an impression on her than honey booboo would anyone be interested in that you all have stuck with me for so long are you interested in going on a new trip with me and more importantly would you help me get the word out p to be completely honest i actually started said blog a looooong time ago and i m planning on reviving it it s http agoodmother wordpress com take our poll posted in uncategorized 1 comment when you least expect it june 13 2013 by a m s sitting here enjoying the peace and quiet of nap time listening to the breeze in the trees and spending a little time playing online you let your guard down you see an article about yet another mother learning her child s image has been taken and used in an internet hoax used to provide some poor sick individual with the attention they crave at the expense of another and you think of the photos posted to another blog in another life and you worry so you suck it up and you load the page for the first time in years and you see the photos of her and she is so tiny and so far away and as soon as you reassure yourself that her life hasn t been taken for someone else s purposes you sink below the waves as they crash over you knocking you off your feet taking your breath away because there should be two others here having to be reminded to play quietly while their sister naps helping get dinner ready before daddy comes home filling this space that is always going to be empty five years is nothing it still feels like yesterday moonpie turns three this weekend she is the best and most wonderful thing to ever happen in my world i wish watching her hit this momentous milestone taking this final step out of baby ness didn t bring so much baggage with it i hug her longer than she would like sometimes i fight against my desire to wrap her in bubble wrap to keep her safe from every sharp corner every bump and bruise she will have to suffer with a baby monitor in her room probably until close to the point of indecency she will struggle under and i will struggle against my desire to over protect because this grief this awful sneaking thief that catches me unaware so many times it taught me that you absolutely never know that all that is beautiful can go to shit the second you look away and nothing and no one will be able to stop it and all you can do is be here now this moment that s it that s all you can be absolutely sure of treasure it suck every drop out of it even the moments when you are so tired and angry and wish you could be anywhere anyone else because the sweep of the second hand can change everything and five years down the road it catches you unaware posted in a life altered 4 comments mondays with moonpie march 18 2013 by a m s no i won t let you take my picture hello you need a doctor please hold posted in uncategorized leave a comment moonpie monday february 11 2013 by a m s posted in uncategorized leave a comment still here february 4 2013 by a m s still cute life is good and as we stumble into bed at the end of every busy day exhausted to the bone i think i probably should have blogged about that posted in uncategorized 1 comment happy birthday january 3 2013 by a m s lennox and zoë in our hearts you are five years old today and we love you posted in uncategorized 2 comments remembrance january 3 2013 by a m s happy birthday my dear sweet lennox and my beautiful strong zoë a good friend asked how we would be spending this day she wondered if we would do something special to mark the day or if we would carve out quiet moments to remember we do a little of both it s a quiet day for us a still day a day when we feel like we exist outside the rest of the world your daddy and i will have a small birthday treat in your honor something sweet to celebrate your birthdays the rest of the day we actively remember there are 362 days every year when you are never far from our thoughts your names always drift through my consciousness and memories of you still float out of the depths of my brain daily but on your birthday and on your individual special days we let down our guard and we remember and as always we speak your names love posted in lennox zoë 5 comments 600 down 400 to go april 15 2012 by a m s and only six days left you know you want to make a donation to team on the road as we march for babies what are you waiting for team on the road donation page every donation no matter how small gets a very special thank you from a sweet little girl who beat the preemie odds posted in uncategorized 1 comment older posts all about zoë sweet zoë change the world all donations go to cook children s hospital to fund neonatal research donate to the march of dimes in memory of lennox in memory of zoë from still life 365 all about me what happens when a not so grown up pair of 30 somethings decide to try to have a kid it s sometimes funny frequently heart wrenching never boring ok sometimes boring the latest chapter in our lives deals with the deaths of our twins born 16 weeks premature and how we figure out where we go from here want to email me ourowncreation at gmail dot com i m back on twitter i ve started a new project on being a good mother i d love it if you d check it out recent comments michelle c on happy blogiversary alwaysmy3boys on happy birthday to you momom on happy birthday to you brandy on happy birthday to you a m s on please join us things that come in handy click here to learn more about the book click here to buy your own copy the i can t do a better blogroll a blogroll of current and former inhabitants of the land of if and its suburbs lost and found and connections abound the emoblopedia infertility s common thread project a glossary of terms iui frequently asked questions learn more about pcos soul cysters dr licciardi s infertility blog stuff i actually use diaper junction when did i say that when did i say that select month january 2014 1 october 2013 2 june 2013 1 march 2013 1 february 2013 2 january 2013 2 april 2012 2 march 2012 2 january 2012 3 november 2011 4 september 2011 2 august 2011 4 july 2011 5 june 2011 2 april 2011 7 march 2011 3 february 2011 4 january 2011 6 december 2010 2 november 2010 5 october 2010 2 september 2010 5 august 2010 6 july 2010 15 june 2010 17 may 2010 13 april 2010 11 march 2010 9 february 2010 4 january 2010 6 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