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Text of the page (random words):
had started he was so young you see i think it was around midnight when he arrived on the doorstep covered in filth and with what we later discovered to be multiple fractures including his pelvis looking back i think that s when things changed i seemed to start to be in the way a lot under her feet she used to say of course she would always apologise and say how much she loved me after the accidents kicked me off my feet at times i remember strange how eric was involved in far fewer accidents than me don t get me wrong i wasn t resentful it wasn t his fault after all suddenly she started to be home more no longer left all day to fend for ourselves days then weeks turned into months and now years finally she was getting to know us more the accidents became less eric of course fought to kept up the dominance he had so slyly achieved he didn t like the new way too much at first the cuddles the treats he had to share i was getting noticed it filled me with joy neither of us knew how poorly she really had been of course you don t see mental illness like a broken bone or a limp do you to be continued would you want to hear more all critique welcome rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in blog general life mental health reader tagged blogger cats comment happiness life 1 comment acceptance posted on 07 04 2016 by desperateramblings i am delighted to say that today i have at last secured a place for myself on a mindfulness course starting in may i can t wait having done a lot of research and reading on the subject i look forward to having a bit of help to actually be able to implement what it teaches me in my life i am ready rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in biography blog general life mental health tagged anxiety blogging brain choices daily happiness life comments off on acceptance oh you too posted on 06 04 2016 by desperateramblings blank or just total useless rubbish rattling around its so hard to stop to clear completely distractions a new noise a different bird song sudden bang or just me watching looking at myself trying to slow this crazy mind of mine concentrate try to remember only hours ago you flowed and swirled with thoughts ideas brilliant plans and chatter oh yes so much happy chatter now blank now when it matters when theres time and quiet just blank i can t remember so many times as i look at them and say i have memory problems and they nod sometimes smile kindly pause then give me instructions or tell me something important why don t they listen and i mean listen i do not choose not to remember they say oh yes that happens to me all the time or oh well were all getting older ha ha no you don t know how it feels what its like all the time ive lost so many precious memories just disappeared from my head or maybe locked away until just before my dying day waiting to fleet across my mind i do no have dementia i have not had a blow to the head or an illness known to cause such issues no label you see just me rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in general 4 comments stuck posted on 06 04 2016 by desperateramblings almost 3 years but finally i got to see the rheumatology department after so many other consultants specialists and the conclusion without boring your rigid is fibromyalgia with differential diagnosis of ms osteoarthritis trigeminal neuralgia cognitive memory issues and anxiety they keep saying i suffer with although i dispute that one i was already well aware of most and re the fibro well i suspected that too how weird it is to somehow feel better with the diagnosis i feel i can now move on as if being labelled validates my head stuff i so know thats not right but hey ho does it really matter i think not actually ooh my words are not yet flowing but it will come i am determined photo just a random one when a lovely rainbow appeared outside our front and i love rainbows so please indulge me to me it represents the brighter future i now have i just need to convince myself its all real as my reality is so stuck in the bad old days i think days i must have got so used to that became my whole being i suppose because the now my future is positive good and could even be fantastic if i can get un stuck disbelief what am i waiting for what is going to push me i m wasting precious time unable to move forward stuck rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in biography blog blogger daily fear general happiness health inspiration life mental health thoughts tagged anxiety blogger brain daily england life mental health comments off on stuck finally posted on 02 12 2015 by desperateramblings i have managed to start my little shop on folksy yay only two items at the moment but few more to add when i can my hands despite ongoing operations seem to be giving up the ghost at an alarming rate someone has put their foot down on my ageing process with no real reason it seems osteoarthritis and fibromyalgia are being blamed but i have to wait to see a rheumatologist for confirmation on the fibro front so although i managed one successful craft fair a couple of weeks ago my planned and booked ones i have had to cancel because of my hands and wrists what to do then with all the bits and pieces i have slowly and carefully made well i like the folksy site so far anyway so am having a bash with them for the time being ebay costs have spiralled and the performance of their actual site seems dreadful these days just wanted to get some sort of post on my blog as i have not for ages and the folksy shop pushed me to share who knows if i will make any sales only time will tell i m of the opinion that if its meant to succeed it will in its own time if it fails well at least i gave it my best shot and move on to something else still got my positivity and calmness rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in biography blog blogging daily fear freshly pressed general happiness health inspiration life mental health thoughts tagged blogger challenge england fibromyalgia general happiness health hope life mental health osteoarthritis pain positivity 9 comments posted on 25 11 2015 by desperateramblings rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in blog blogger daily freshly pressed general happiness mental health thoughts tagged blogging brain comment england life mental health 3 comments life is amazing posted on 24 11 2015 by desperateramblings source life is amazing rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in general comments off on life is amazing at last posted on 24 11 2015 by desperateramblings i must have been about 3 years old in this photo sitting next to my big brother who would have been around 7yrs old i guess mum would have known but of course as you know i can no longer ask her there have been so many things already that i needed to ask her since she has passed over but of course this is now impossible to me this just emphasises her loss but i am managing well and know she would be proud of what i am at last becoming contented happy and a teeny bit successful even yes i eventually managed to attend my first ever craft fair as a seller selling bits i had made years i have promised myself this year i would do it but for one reason or another usually health related it did not happen saturday at 10 am prompt the doors opened and i was pretty nervous i have to say very scary wondering if anyone would like what i had made and further would anyone actually want to buy any of it midday arrived and i could hardly keep up with the enquiries the compliments and yes even some sales it has taken days to actually sink in to be honest but i have immediately booked up for another this saturday and very much hope to attend one each weekend until christmas i realise next week may not be so good or it may be better who knows none of us but the confidence boost it has given me to even put myself out there is immense yes mum dad you would both be very proud as indeed i am of myself my yarn trees i m also now on the precipice of having a go at selling online maybe through facebook or folksy or even both it has been a long while since i have published on here for many reasons not least being that i have been going through the ill health retirement from work i am now fully retired and its pretty weird tbh but im getting to make the most of it the best way i can and making a happy busy life for myself now without the 9 to 5 as it were i am finding that setting a routine and schedule are most important as it is all too easy to sit back and just wonder at what will be i want to be successful in my own right and i am just starting the road to hopefully gain that achievement i hope some of my old followers will come back and find my posts interesting as before there are so many new topics i would love to write about and discuss with readers synchronicity i have just stumbled upon and wow it fascinates me i relate to it so much anyhow for now i just wanted to get this i m back post out there and lets go from here shall we lets see what happens rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in biography blog blogger blogging fear freshly pressed general happiness health life mental health reader thoughts tagged blog blogger general life mental health 2 comments must see posted on 04 09 2015 by desperateramblings little girl sings to her grandmother brings tears of joy to my eyes must see courtesy of youtube rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in blog daily fear freshly pressed general happiness health humour mental health reader thoughts youtube tagged beauty blog blogger blogging bravery grangmother happiness joy 2 comments why posted on 04 09 2015 by desperateramblings does the darkness take hold when im alone rate this please share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr more share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin like loading posted in blog general life mental health tagged anxiety blog blogger blogging brain challenge darkness depression england 3 comments older posts follow randomravingsfromcornwall on wordpress com top posts pages follow me on twitter my tweets 6 spam blocked by akismet opens in a new tab follow blog via email enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email email address follow join 202 other subscribers archives april 2016 december 2015 november 2015 september 2015 august 2015 march 2015 february 2015 january 2015 december 2014 november 2014 september 2014 desperateramblings follow randomravingsfromcornwall on wordpress com top posts pages just for fun brainy quotes on growing old rss posts rss comments 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