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Text of the page (random words):
and tilly was holding her horse s head under her arm and the rest of the horse under the other arm she started to cry you wouldn t leave me crying when there s room on your horse for two would you milly she pleaded to her sister yes said milly f k off tilly suddenly the sound of galloping hooves could be heard approaching along the beach the next moment a great white horse came into view its rider s fair hair flowing in the wind a cloud of spray from the sea whipping up around it the horse came to a halt in the yard ayup girls said the rider jump on my daughters dropped their hobby horses and leapt aboard back in a while mrs super called the rider as she pulled on the reins turned the horse and galloped off towards the horizon but milly i cried out after my vanishing beloved children you ve got the car keys i turned back towards the stable girl who was that masked metaphor i asked but she was reaching into her bag for lunch her arm emerged and she turned towards me holding something up fancy an apple she said posted by rilly super on 30 3 08 15 comments labels apples bears children crying hobby horses horses life in the north rolf harris saturday march 22 2008 the schlong good friday it was lovely to see so many people from far and wide at the stables open day soon after we arrived i saw a couple of londoners who were exchanging the traditional southern greeting what are you looking at said the first are you talking to me you slag replied the other it s so good to be reminded of home i thought as they beat each other to a pulp behind the manure pile the warm memories that welled up inside me made me quite forget the cold north wind that whistled around my breeches my daughter tilly interupted my homesick reverie however crikey that s enormous she exclaimed running over to a big horse in the corner of the yard and she wasn t pointing at his tail like fabio giggled milly what kind of horse horse is he tilly asked the stable lass he s a stud my dear said the girl helpfully my daughters giggled like fabio does he run in races asked milly no said the girl his job is to be special friends with the ladies when they get a bit frisky my daughters looked at each other in feigned solemnity not like fabio then they both said together and started giggling again i sighed where is your father and his secretary anyway i asked the children fabio is over at that stall and daddy has gone to look for some lunch said milly suddenly i saw a familiar figure in the distance rupert could it really be him taming that new young filly breaking her spirit and making her bend to his will no it couldn t be and he didn t seem to notice me i wandered over to see what fabio was buying at the riding gear stall have you got this in his size he said holding something up and pointing to my husband the lady behind the stall looked slightly annoyed we don t have that in men s sizes dear she explained ha said fabio so you won t sell this to me well exclaimed fabio with huff you are only refusing to sell me this because he is a not a woman no dear replied the lady because he is not a horse dear i was just going to ask fabio if he should perhaps try soho or the internet but then my husband appeared ok chaps lunch is here he cried you d never have thought that new macrobiotic organic place in islington would have opened a northern franchise but look at this carrots and straw cutting edge cuisine guys rilly must really be having an influence around here finally after a long day i was at last lying in bed sharing that longed for peaceful moment with my much missed husband you couldn t get me a glass of water could you dear i asked him softly oh he moaned it s cold fabio get rilly a glass of water fabio groaned you won t even get your wife a glass of water what a terrible husband you are sometimes he said shhhhush i told them both you ll wake the baby mummy said milly can fabio fetch a hot water bottle if he s going downstairs and for me too said tilly milly s feet are like ice why do we all have to sleep in the same bed anyway mummy because it will sell more copies of my book in america dear i explained exasperated at my daughters evident naivety in the us rural downshifting memoir market just then the baby began to cry some doubtless unspeakable polish phrases began to emmanate from the au pair and the peaceful bank holiday i d hoped for seemed to disappear in a crash before my eyes i just grabbed my catherine cooksons and no actually that isn t cockney slang and fled downstairs to my laptop and my book and but what was this a message on my voicemail air hellair rilly rupert here don t think i didn t see you earlier what i just thought i put the phone down no i couldn t mummy the baby s been sick cried tilly down the stairs i looked at the clock 2 am i shouted back up the stairs milly tilly get dressed darlings riding lessons this morning posted by rilly super on 22 3 08 13 comments labels children fabio good friday horses husband nanny riding lessons friday march 21 2008 up the ash tree climbs the ivy up the ivy climbs the sun there have been racing yards in middleham whose castle served as the childhood home of richard iii since the 18th century and the annual good friday open day is a good opportunity to meet some northern celebrities and blend seamlessy in with the locals so off we set into the bright but forecast to be shortlived early spring sunshine to mummy said milly looking over my shoulder yes dear i muttered stopping typing i find your use of betjemen to invoke some kind of nineteen fifties rural idyll that probably never actually existed unconvincing and furthermore your attempt to dignify your inane witterings about your daily life by feigning an interest in the history and heritage of the north are to be perfectly frank rather laboured there was a moment of silence gosh milly what do you suggest dear milly looked at me with exasperated expression just stick to doing knob gags mummy she offered by way of counsel i turned to look at the snow now falling past the window and sighed returning to my so thoroughly scorned attempt to embellish the story i know that milly really meant that perhaps i needed to get back to basics just stick to the facts i hit delete typed the schlong good friday into the title box and began to write posted by rilly super on 21 3 08 5 comments labels blog children good friday horses snow sunshine thursday march 13 2008 north and south i knocked on the door footsteps were heard in the hallway and my neighbour opened the door hello rilly said my neighbour what s the matter love i think i ve run over a cow i told him not a sacred one i hope he smiled i lowered my gaze i didn t need to say more fancy a brew he asked standing aside from the door i went in come on through he said i ll put kettle on just then the phone rang my neighbour picked up the receiver what s that he asked the caller trouble at mill you say he repeated grinning at me i smiled embarrassedly with a few more words he ended the call you mustn t worry about those londoners pet he assured me they ve never heard of galileo down there still think the universe revolves around them galileo i queried aye galileo he said hmm galileo i pondered rilly let me go he said kettle s boiling and i unhanded him so he could make the tea i moved a little closer to the fire as my neighbour clanked mugs in the kitchen and with my damp feet starting to warm by the hearth i was sure i was feeling a tingly sensation i hadn t felt for a long time static it must be i thought to myself bloody northerners and their synthetic carpets and i wondered if my neighbour had any brandy in sigh posted by rilly super on 13 3 08 9 comments labels cold feet london neighbour north and south wednesday march 12 2008 boyz n the sisterhood last week of course it was international women s day and as an ardent feminist i was naturally keen to participate by giving a talk as an inspirational woman but alas the invitation i received asked me to do a speech encouraging bright young gels to give up their careers and write blogs and my publishers banned me from doing it as they didn t want to crowd the market what s more the charity nude lady bloggers calender i posed for had all it s copies seized by the obscene publications squad following a terrible rumour about girl with a one track mind s picture for february it looked then like i was sadly just going to spend another morning playing woman s hour bingo with freya s mother but she had mary wollstonecraft men and something else beginning with m that i can t even mention on her card so i never stood a chance the game lasted all of thirty seconds and then we just listened in silence to a novelist tearfully recounting her emotional journey of recovery and self discovery after not quite remembering where she d left her car keys my husband saved the day however because knowing how much it meant to me he and his ever loyal secretary fabio attended the million woman march down in london on my behalf unfortunately only a couple of thousand turned up my neighbour said that a million women did originally set off to go to london for the march but what with no men to read the map well that s just the kind of attitude we re protesting about sigh my husband told me all about the keynote speaker apparently she stood on the podium for two hours just looking really annoyed and everyone had to guess why she was upset i don t know why my husband commented on this he s been married ten years sigh he s obviously spent longer away from me than i thought sadly they were asked to leave when their sincere attempt to blend in was tragically misinterpreted and anyway they would have had to leave the march for sexual equality early regardless because there were three hundred ladies loos but no gents so that s one in the eye for the patriarchy i suppose sigh posted by rilly super on 12 3 08 7 comments labels feminism ghettos mary wollstonecraft men womans hour monday march 10 2008 desperate house of commons wives i bumped into ffion just the other day she and i have so much in common two women both married to a william who s very important and spends a lot of time in london both far from home the politics might come between us her husband is more interested in matters of high diplomacy but we labour chaps like to deal with the grass roots because after all the roots are all that s left of the grass after the napalm has finally burned itself out but if she wasn t a tory and i wasn t so jolly well working class i m sure we d get on very well actually i m not quite sure what class ffion is from as she s welsh and they probably have their own devolved class system in wales now so perhaps we can be chums after all anyway the reason i mention it of course is that as the jetlag finally starts to get to david attenborough who sadly reportedly now so is identified with that gorilla scene that he starts crouching down and whispering whenever anyone so much as opens a packet of peanuts in his earshot the bbc has done a series on the rare and exotic within our own shores and in their search for working class people their researchers even visited my own village although they didn t find anyone to be in the show as the whole population had just been moved out to make way for filming a gritty but heart warming northern drama for itv milly rather reduced my chances of being interviewed on tv though as when she answered the door to the bbc she told them her mother neither worked nor had any class sigh this isn t the first time the girl has hurt my feelings like this just the other day she came home from school very pleased with herself i got an a in science mummy she proclaimed proudly and the teacher said i could be an engineer at wilton or corus when i m older my heart sank my own daughter going into trade in the north i fought back the tears this had been a labour party family as far back as i could remember we d always stood up for the poor and powerless like lord sainsbury rupert murdoch roman abramovich even my neighbour says poor old roman must be feeling hard done by at the moment i ll make a socialist out of him yet our family had always done proper jobs that made you proud to go to conference jobs that were tough and dirty but had to be done public relations civil servants left wing playwrights sunday times columnists my daughter s announcement of an interest in commerce felt like my fountain pen being pushed through my heart but darling i said choking don t you want to write a blog like mummy when you grow up milly just didn t understand i can still write a blog even if i have a job can t i she said quizzically oh her youthful innocence what would she write about i wanted to ask her today i went to work and came home watched a bit of telly before going to bed tears welled up in my eyes didn t she know that a really successful blog was one about other people doing stuff my god providing your own material for your blog whatever next but milly think of your family i cried think of your grandfather who fought in the war milly raised her eyebrows grandfather was born in 1947 she said but think of your great grandmother who threw herself in front of the king s horse milly sighed but it was beating the favourite mummy which great granny had bet the house on without telling great grandaddy she retorted anyway continued my heart breaking daughter if i got a job i could get dooced and then my blog would be even bigger than your s i sighed a big sigh that s my girl i think and i wondered if ffion had the kettle on posted by rilly super on 10 3 08 10 comments labels blog children crying david attenborough dooced family ffion gorillas grandparents grassroots labour party the north thursday march 06 2008 america the kansas bar and grill next to the cinema here in the north seems to have closed naturally i don t normally frequent such places but i had grown rather fond of it with it s brokeback mountain midwest shop fronts sawn off wall mounted red convertible with surfboard on the back seat and ceiling suspended crop duster plane it just seemed to conjure up all those things that aren t quite one side of the ocean or the other bill bryson henry and shea s mildenhall rendition of drift away the inside of miss baroque s flat sometimes of course you can have too much american influence with your after film martini so to get away from it all i can always go straight home and watch the government announce their foreign policy on the news of course i usually disapprove of anything that pretends to be something else and as you know with this blog it s facts alone that are wanted and what s more i really don t know why anyone who works in an office or a factory feels the need to seek out such escapism if they think their life is hard they should try downshifting i shall miss the old place though and now when the greyhound turns off the a19 at stockton it just won t be the same my neighbour says i m only sad be...