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Text of the page (random words):
theart in sl or she is holding me i feel held in first life when i am kissing her i feel kissed when she hurts i hurt with her this is only going to get stronger as the ways that avatars can express themselves get better in a way my sweetheart is her beautiful avatar and i am mine we give full expression to our inner selves through our avatars that little doll is important to me she has a kind of life of her own that was true right from the start of course she doesn t have independent existence but just like a character in a novel she behaves in a consistent realistic manner she behaves in a way that fits her on going story i cannot or at least would not make her do just anything a novelist loves her characters i love mine and i love many of those she interacts with characters constantly being written by other novelists i think this love is real anyone who is not in sl maybe even some who are will probably think i m crazy do i have an overactive imagination or does the imagination of others need a boost addendum the photo is of my friends eloria and merik i m not in there posted by veronique lalonde at 8 45 a m 5 comments labels love monday november 24 2008 second chance second life is a lot of things for me i ve given up on trying to separate immersion from augmentation for me sl is both immersion in fantasy and social networking with real people i interact with real people through a virtual world in which all kinds of fantastic things are possible not the least of which is that i can be an accomplished ballroom dancer i dig that in sl i am not solitary i wish i could enjoy solitary time more use it to explore or whatever but i don t very much i like to be with other avatars other people i m not great about keeping up with all the people on my friends list and i ve been dumped for neglect sometimes but i keep up with quite a few they are real friends they re important to me i form deeper relationships as well not even two months into my second life i formed a partnership with patrice our relationship is pretty well documented in this blog all the ups and downs the difficult times and the more numerous wonderful times we learned to trust each other slowly it s difficult in a medium where you can t really see the other person and we shared so much of our lives with each other in many ways it was a second marriage for me which worked thanks to the non jealous patience of my wonderful first life spouse it probably helps that my spouse doesn t much like sl and doesn t think of it as real patrice and i split up a little over a year ago i m happy we are still friends at first as always after a close relationship it was refreshingly different to be on my own but for me that never lasts too long i almost formed a new partnership with someone i ll call raven hair whom i had long been friends with and became even closer to during the first months of my singularity she asked i said no at the time i was so busy in first life that i knew i would not have been able to give her the kind of time and attention she needed it hurt me terribly to say no it hurt me terribly for more than a year afterward she met someone else and they partnered it was all i could do to attend the wedding i was truly happy for her but i was unhappy for myself still i maintained a close friendship with her i met a darling redhead a friend of raven hair as it turned out and we saw each other for a short time it didn t work there were misunderstandings from the start we have since become friends but we weren t right for a romantic relationship then there was the blond omg i had a mad crush on her from the minute i met her we had been friends not close but good since that time she was even sort of my boss at one point when i was doing a dj gig we had always enjoyed talking with each other last spring she indicated that she was interested in something more my heart lept i moved too quickly we had more misunderstandings lots of them more serious ones we had wonderful times and terrible times and for all that we were never really in a relationship that was all about trying to work things out we are still friends but i think it s best if that s how we leave it i still think she is one of the most beautiful avatars in sl and i like her very much but we both know that there s much more to a relationship even in sl i was close to writing a woe is me blog entry a tale of hopeless love but i never did that s probably just as well not long ago my poor raven hair s heart was broken her partnership ended in a way that was very hurtful to her as her friend indeed perhaps her best friend i felt bad for her i knew how hurt she was she does not hold back when giving her heart i was torn between my own selfishness and wanting only what was best for her i hope we have found a path that works for both of us we have not plighted any troth but we are seeing each other romantically i need to give her time and space but i wasn t about to be all noble and watch someone else zoom in and take her away i had my own heart to think of if i had lost her a second time i would have been devastated so we are together yet going slowly she is still healing and i need to learn patience i love her dearly i have for quite a long time and i know that she loves me i trust her and trust her love i need to trust more many people seem to have more confidence in sl when they express themselves through their avatars leave it to me to ave the opposite i have plenty of confidence in first life in sl i am a silly schoolgirl i must do better than that both for my sake and for the sake of my raven haired beauty posted by veronique lalonde at 2 13 p m 3 comments labels love sunday october 5 2008 living free my second life is still pretty low key these days so i didn t want to bore you by writing about it here it s not entirely gone though i dj at the velvet from 2 4 p m on thursdays which is 5 7 p m eastern time 10 p m midnight in the uk and 11 p m 1 a m in europe just so you know it s been a bit lonely on most afternoons so far although i ve had some special visitors after not having seen illya for weeks i had a nice talk with her a few days ago we just talked and i think we actually communicated no pressure no expectations it was really nice i hope we can meet up again soon but my first life schedule doesn t allow that much none of that was worth kicking this blog into action though here s what is gender freedom day in digital worlds october 25 2008 this is an idea started by sl resident sophrosyne stenvaag who helped create the extropia sim here is her explanation for why she declared gender freedom day in digital worlds the last straw came yesterday when a friend was attacked in social media and later pilloried on a blog for the expression of her sexuality she goes on to say that the same thing happens to many other women in sl as well as to queers of all gender persuasions as she puts it in my counselling practice rather slow at the moment many of my clients came to me with gender issues sl is the perfect place to explore them most of the cross gender avatars i met weren t about deception for many sl is the only place they can express what they feel to be their true gender for some sl is a way to help them decide whether they need to go further people need this freedom to explore themselves if not in sl or some other virtual world then where i do not approve of deception or playing with people s emotions but that should not preclude those who do not deceive from expressing themselves in a way that they feel they must for their own mental well being and i definitely do not approve of self appointed people who feel they must out others gender freedom day in digital worlds was brought to my attention by my friend shockwave plasma who wrote about it in her own blog she included links to sophrosyne s blog as well as to an article that ran in the metaverse journal i decided one more blog entry with links couldn t hurt even if most people have given up on this mess of virtual scribbling october 25 extropia sim spread the word but not to haters posted by veronique lalonde at 9 49 p m no comments wednesday july 23 2008 pictures at 11 google analytics tells me this blog still gets visitors every day even though i am bad about posting new material according to the stats visitors stay an average of 49 seconds this is probably plenty of time for them to figure out that my second life just isn t very exciting right now i see illya when we can manage to be in world at the same time at the very least on thursday nights when she djs at club your destiny i still go to the velvet where i was last night dancing to music by dj therese slade i try to stay in touch with other friends on my list i catch up with anwen when she has a bit of free time my closet could really use cleaning out since there are so many clothes that i m just not going to wear again but that s not a task that anyone enjoys i did meet a new person gospeed racer whose picture you see here is someone i met in plurk where i spend an alarming amount of time and have the karma points to prove it last thursday i popped over to see her on the beach at extropia she showed me the car she was going to race at a relay for life event on the weekend gospeed is a blogger a much more active one than me and she s involved in all kinds of sl events so maybe i can liven up my own sl oh my closet is still a mess but i did catch up with one thing my flickr site i posted probably a couple dozen new pictures there if you re interested i also submitted a couple of shots to gospeed s second life ebony group which seem to have passed muster i m not nearly as ebony as some but gospeed said that she s interested in a fairly wide range of non white skin tones there are some beautiful pictures in that group and i m happy to be a part of it now i ll try to find interesting stuff to write about m kay posted by veronique lalonde at 8 49 a m no comments labels miscellaneous sunday july 6 2008 party girl i met codebastard redgrave through twitter but i ve also gotten to know her a bit in second life she is a sweet person and very generous she is also talented she created the boudoir rouge a series of lingerie photographs of women in second life including yours truly she designed a device call the machinimacam for people to use to make sl films she is very involved in sl often as part of major events in not much more than a year codie as her friends call her has made a solid reputation for herself in sl she is a genuine celebrity even though codie has become larger than second life by this point she still counts me as a friend you know how people say don t forget your friends when you get to the top well codie doesn t forget her friends and i appreciate that yesterday the place to be in second life was the reopening of the code red lounge an all day and all night non stop party i was busy in first life for much of the day and evening but later at night i went in world put on a sexy red dress red shoes and my colourable full body tattoo coloured red of course and headed over to code red i still have my vip tag from the original lounge at 11 p m sl pacific time the place was packed i ve tried to show just how full the place was but it was much more crowded than it looks in that photo considering that the lag wasn t too bad although as you can see from the grey people my client and computer were not handling the situation in an optimal fashion still i could dance it was hard to talk to anyone because there was so much going on i could barely move from my spot without running into someone else and i was kind of far away from people i might have chatted with i did manage to say hi to codie and to congratulate her i said hi to my friend jacek antonelli although i could barely see her my dear friend tatsuko hayashida was there and i could just about see her name tag i said hi to new twitter friend gabby panacek a good friend of codie but i don t think she heard me or maybe i didn t hear her want some name dropping i saw designer callie cline fashion maven celebrity trollop and several well known bloggers like crap mariner if i d paid closer attention and maybe moved around a bit more my computer is lame so i don t have much distance resolution i bet i could drop a few more names when i was there eris alexandre was streaming a kind of electro mix and both the action and chat were going fast and furious a lot of people thrive in that kind of atmosphere me not so much i wanted to go for a while because codie is my friend but i m not really so good at huge parties like that it s easy for me to feel lost i have a lot of friends in sl but i m not really connected and a lot of dance music just isn t my thing at least not when i m only virtually dancing real dancing is another matter entirely i m glad the party was such a success for codie and it wasn t nearly over when i left there were djs on until 7 a m i almost beamed over to my grungy indie music home away from home the velvet where my favourite spider lolotehe menoptra was streaming as an antidote to the bright red limelight but it had been a long day in first life so i went off line congratulations codie i hope you have a blast with your new sim i ll drop back in when things are less mad because the sim is supposed to have some great builds on it posted by veronique lalonde at 9 35 a m no comments labels exploring wednesday june 18 2008 longing it s only second life it shouldn t hurt so much but it does it s been a while since i ve seen my love she hasn t communicated the last time we spoke in im and not even face to face she was filled with doubts about us and our relationship doubts that i don t have doubts that i don t really understand i did my best to put her mind at ease but i don t think i succeeded she was the one who broke the ice a couple months ago thus opening my life to a possibility that i had wanted ever since i first met her so it was very much a mutual thing from the start having wanted to be with her for so long i was primed to lose my heart to her rather quickly maybe too quickly but i love who i love and it happens when it happens i m not sorry for that there might be all kinds of legitimate reasons that she hasn t been in touch drama belongs on stage not in my life ok yes i am blogging about this i m not going to draw conclusions based on an absence of evidence we have had very good times together and i hope there will be many more to come i can t help that i love her i hope i m not just being a fool i hope she s ok i m sittin on the dock of the bay watching the tide roll away thank you otis redding i ll sit and wait and hope posted by veronique lalonde at 9 41 a m 1 comment labels miscellaneous thursday may 22 2008 welcome to de swamp my sweetie was in a meeting i wasn t sure what i wanted to do i got an im from my friend aki clutterbuck asking if i wanted to come see her new store au jus sure i beamed over there to find...