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ecause those who mind don t matter and those who matter don t mind dr seuss at 27 i look back on my 20 s in an interesting way i m not yet out of my 20 s but i m old enough now that i ve started looking back on the past 7 years with a lot of clarity i don t take any of it back as regretting the past is as useful as placing your hands on a hot stove but if i was back in my early 20 s again and knew wiser there are so many things i would do differently making the most of life isn t as difficult as it might sometimes seem you can have an amazing life right now if you give up doing these nine things settling for less than your worth whether it s settling to be with someone you don t truly love deciding to just take that 50 hours a week job your friend offered you because you don t think you ll ever finish school or turning your back on what you love don t settle for less than your worth the likelihood is you re worth far more than you give yourself credit for by the time we re young adults we ve been through so much in life that we can often think things like i m not good enough or i don t deserve that but you are good enough and you do deserve that one of the greatest fallacies in life is the idea that we re incomplete that we re missing a screw lacking something or altogether messed up but this couldn t be further from the truth you were born absolutely and completely whole and you continue to be no matter what you go through no matter how many mistakes you make and no matter who wronged you you re the same beautiful person you began life as realize that you re priceless and stop settling for less than you re worth changing for others i was guilty of this myself we act like someone we re not to get the girl or guy we like we do something unlike ourselves to impress a group of people we want to be our friends and overall we give up what makes us us just so that others will like us but all this ends up doing is making us lose track of ourselves in the needs of others we forget who we are and when we come to we realize all that time was wasted wandering around in disillusion don t change who you are for others the people that are right for you will love you for you not for who you re trying to be spending the day online the internet is the future it s as simple as that everything you could ever want to know is on the internet and a lot of the most popular forms of entertainment too oh and you can make a living on the internet to boot so it makes sense that we d spend so much time online but to spend almost literally all day online is unhealthy both with regards to your body and your mind maybe you re a programmer or run a blog and spend a huge portion of each day online that s fine you re making a living or are working on making a living through the internet but even then you need to get out and experience nature talk to people face to face and just plain have fun with all those things that life has to offer that you can never find or experience online learn how to balance your life between time online and time fully experiencing the beauty of life while disconnected and you ll be far happier and healthier thinking likes and followers genuine friends one of the biggest mistakes we make in our 20 s is convincing ourselves that facebook friends followers 1 s and the like are genuine friends but genuine friendship is built upon the depth of the connection between two people you can t go through things or experience life with followers and facebook friends the most you can do is like the same post and occasionally say what s up or yeah me too today do a quick inventory how many genuine friends do you have if you re having hard times or something comes up unexpectedly who do you have that you could turn to if that answer is one or none you probably need to get out and start building some genuine friendships our relationships are the most telling factor in not only our ability to be happy but plays a big part in helping us thrive in all areas of life so invest time in building friendships it will serve you well for the rest of your life sweeping problems under the rug when we re younger we tend to push our problems aside or ignore them often for endeavors that help us drown them out and forget about them altogether but that won t make them go away they re still there waiting for their chance to strike adopt the habit of taking care of things whether regular responsibilities serious issues or surprise occurrences head on and as soon as they come up remind yourself that whether you take care of it now or later you still have to do it eventually and that if you put it off it can escalate into a far worse problem than what it is now you ll begin really living life the day you decide to face yourself all your problems whether big or small decide today to lift the rug on all of your problems and shine a light and you ll discover how exhilarating and joy filled life can be caring what others think of you the number one fear that holds us back is the fear of what others may think of us at one point or another we all suffer from it it s only natural to feel this way i felt this intensely from the time i was a young teenager all the way up into my 20 s this is probably most intense from high school on into our 20 s a time where we often want to impress or at least not feel the critical eye of numerous groups of people from the other sex groups of friends or potential friends to potential employers and family but guess what in a very real sense while you might think that all these people are constantly looking at you and being critical of you most people are never if every thinking about you once you realize this it s nothing short of a life changing realization don t believe me use yourself as an example are you constantly thinking about those around you nitpicking and being overly critical of everyone near you or are you too busy being concerned with your own problems and aspirations to sit around thinking critically of everyone around you the likelihood is you don t and almost no one else does either and those that do well thinking you only have a few options i grew up thinking i had to go to college to make something of myself and while this is a respectable path thinking this was my only option is just another example of limited thinking don t convince yourself that you have to take some specific path in life this all comes down to not restricting yourself and thinking your only options are what you see everyone else doing or what others expect you to do the world really is open to you and you have so many different options in front of you look around use your creativity and don t take no for an answer get out there and live your life and don t let anything hold you back living absent minded truth be told this isn t a problem only 20 somethings have but it is a critical ingredient to thriving in life and something which if tackled now will show huge dividends both immediately in your life now and for decades to come the way we usually live our lives we re pushed and pulled here and there based on a combination of responsibilities impulses and only the occasional moment of clarity we live quite literally only half awake to the moment in front of us more often worried about the future and regretting the past do this simple exercise say to yourself i am awake i m here right now fully alive to the beauty of this moment as you say this focus your attention completely on the present moment experience get out of your head completely stop purposely thinking thoughts will still crop up without you doing anything this is ok and be fully alive to this moment your entire life is waiting for you realize how amazing your life can be by simply becoming fully awake to the moment in front of you thinking you have all your life right now it can seem like you have so much time that there s little bother rushing to tackle anything of value this is natural and you shouldn t rush around doing anything either way but you need to live aware of the fact that life is a lot short than you think before you know it you re going to turn around and be 30 and when this happens you re going to wonder where all the time you wasted went create a bucket list make plans and get out there and do all those things you ve always wanted to do as you grow older you ll find the only things you regret are the things you didn t do zachary scott looking for happily ever after since we were little tykes through t v movies books and stories of all kinds we ve been fed the idea of happily ever after that is when you can gain the perfect conditions for happiness and an overall great life such as your special someone your ideal house a nice job and the like then the rest of your life you ll remain blissfully happy this idea is never more present than when we re in our 20 s setting out in the world for the first time searching for ourselves and striving for our goals but happily ever after isn t at all true nothing will magically make you happy for the rest of your life but this isn t a bad thing and it doesn t mean we can t find happiness on the contrary you don t have to wait 3 5 or 10 years to find happiness the conditions for an amazing life all exist right now within you you don t need to find the one you don t need to make more money and you don t need to get rid of your problems you can be happy right now in this very moment by fully accepting yourself embracing your struggles and realizing that it s through these very things that you can see the beauty in life stop waiting for the perfect conditions to start really living realize you can be truly happy right now by embracing life fully with open arms 40 712775 74 005973 share this share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on telegram opens in new window telegram share on whatsapp opens in new window whatsapp print opens in new window print more share on x opens in new window x share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on reddit opens in new window reddit like loading featured posted on october 7 2018 categories stop waiting for the perfect conditions to start really living uncategorized tags bebloggerofficial conditions living life really living 20 comments on stop waiting for the perfect conditions to start really living how to increase your willpower the willpower response is a reaction to an internal conflict you want to do one thing such as smoke a cigarette or supersize your lunch but know you shouldn t or you know you should do something like file your taxes or go to the gym but you d rather do nothing okay we know that we only have so much willpower and as we go about our day stress and normal self control deplete our resource let s see what options we have for increasing the pool of willpower we have to draw from increase your capacity for pressure learn how to manage stress to start with we need to manage our stress levels being under high levels of stress means that our body s energy is used up in acting instinctively and making decisions based on short term outcomes our prefrontal cortex loses out in the battle for our energy when high stress is involved it is said that stopping to take a few deep breaths when we feel overwhelmed or tempted can be a great start in managing our stress levels and improving our willpower encourage yourself to stick to your plan to make it even easier it appears that self affirmation can even help you to have more self control when you re running out according to a study published in the journal of personality and social psychology a good example of this is the difference between telling yourself i can t and i don t taking back control of the situation using the phrase i don t has been shown to be more effective at helping you to stick to your plan and break bad habits so try telling yourself that you don t do that bad habit rather than punishing yourself by saying i can t get more sleep to help your brain manage energy better getting enough sleep makes a big difference in how efficiently our prefrontal cortex works luckily it also cites studies that have shown we can make this work in our favor by ensuring we get enough sleep and if you re wondering how much sleep is enough here s a rough guide one of the most acclaimed sleep researchers daniel kripke found in a recent study that people who sleep between 6 5 hours and 7 5 hours a night live the longest are happier and most productive meditate for as little as 8 weeks meditation has also been linked to increasing the reserve of willpower we have available as well as improving attention focus stress management and self awareness this can even give fast results better exercise and nutrition the most ignored route to higher willpower another great way to train the brain that is often easily ignored or undervalued yet can make you a lot more resilient to stress and thus boost willpower is regular physical exercise both relaxing mindful exercise like yoga and intense physical training can provide these benefits though points out that we re not sure why this works yet as i mentioned earlier what you feed your body affects how much energy the prefrontal cortex has to work with this is why nutrition is so important not only will exercise and good nutrition improve your willpower but they ll make you feel better as well exercise in particular is known for making us happy by releasing endorphins postpone things for later to gain focus on what s important now postponing something you really shouldn t have can be effective if you re trying to break a bad habit in willpower rediscovering the greatest human strength roy f baumeister explains that people who tell themselves not now but later are generally less tormented by the temptation of something they are trying to avoid his example is eating chocolate cake 40 712775 74 005973 share this share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on telegram opens in new window telegram share on whatsapp opens in new window whatsapp print opens in new window print more share on x opens in new window x share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on reddit opens in new window reddit like loading featured posted on october 5 2018 categories how to increase your willpower uncategorized tags inspiration bebloggerofficial believing life strength truth willpower 11 comments on how to increase your willpower love attachment or sexual desire the world is little people are little human life is little there is only one big thing desire from time to time our romantic relationships can be difficult to understand part of this confusion stems from the fact that our relationships are influenced by three ...
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