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lk able for him and he does it with little mumbling he sounds just like that old bear on that cartoon when i was a child we are taking everything one day literally one day at a time well i am he still has days of ramble and i listen still there are those days where he will get so frustrated that it seems the only way he can show his independence is to argue to get upset or pick at me over something anything really it is at these times where i realize that it doesn t make sense to get angry because it isn t him the best i can do is to take a break sit on the back deck be honest with him by letting him know he s being an old poop at which time he will usually follow me out sit next to me take my hand and just sit with me and our three dogs it is at this time that i know and the wisdom to know the difference so needless to say for the past few weeks i d been crying and carrying on with friends and family thinking that i must have done something huge to deserve such a horrible turn of events to have happened we can t pay our rent are having issues with other bills food etc i finally got moved out of my other apartment the only friend that would help me my friend melody out of everybody i know it truly is amazing what happens when you are trying to get help to move quite comical really just what excuses come up and that took us three truck loads and ended up costing over eight hundred dollars i know i should have just hired someone live and learn anyway my point being i was so sick by the end of that move i was down for over a week could barely lift my head but i think that that was what it took for me to see the courage to accept the things i cannot change and the wisdom to know the difference i finally got it and lo and behold calls started coming in we are still broke but not for long things that puzzled me in the past like those darn cover letters oh i hated those no longer a problem so i m not sure about karma or hell or any of that bad stuff i believe that life happens to all of us and if we keep fighting what is happening and fretting over what might happen we will never be happy i choose to be happy with my love regardless and cherish him today tonight tomorrow and every day til death separates us i can t change his health but i can help to make his time left on this planet the best with each kiss each moment we make love and with each night we watch and gaze at the stars share this share on facebook opens in new window facebook email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr share on x opens in new window x print opens in new window print share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on reddit opens in new window reddit like loading 2 comments i ve searched and searched and he was right there under the old wedding dress posted on december 12 2014 by nora l pratt under journal entry journey of the month i started this blog as a way to find myself prior to when i was a mrs yet the path that i thought would lead me to my independent self led me to my satisfied self my loved and accepted self these past four years i ve discovered my mistakes my baggage and have embarked on the journey of single life during this time i nursed my sister through cancer and eventually came to grieve her death lived through a fire after losing almost all that i treasured and held dear only to find new friends and things to hold in their place since my move to small town america i ve discovered a new love for the simpler things in life and i ve rediscovered my love for that one man who i fell in love with back in 1986 doug yes we are back together again and will be remarrying sometime in 2015 it took sometime for us both to realize our own baggage and contributions to the demise of our marriage but we are ready to move forward doug will be moving in with me to small town america as he enjoys retirement i will work and hopefully publish my book i figure that it is time for him to live the retired life for a change i just find it funny how these things work out all this time i thought i would be oh so much happier living independently or with someone else when all those other men i was seeing were being compared in my mind s eye to doug nobody would ever love me enough or care for me enough truly loving me for me in spite of my faults and i have plenty of them believe me i talk to myself you know that all of the men i dated would try to change me or would be threatened by me or would simply use me and dismiss me remember honey anyway after a few months of going round and round and his persuasive wooing i came to realize that i ve always loved him something i ve never denied actually and that we should be together for better or worse in sickness and in health there is something to be said about true love you know the kind where you just fit together right in that crook in the neck while lying in bed or finishing each other s sentences knowing what the other will want for dinner as if instinctively and still being able to look at them through all their faults with love in your eyes when i returned into his life and into his home i noticed that all the little things i loved he kept all my little collections the sheets i bought the salt and pepper shaker collection my hearts everything as if to say if i keep it she will return i was endeared by the fact that he kept these items while at the same time any other man would have destroyed them that was when i started to realize truly that he never fell out of love for me and i guess i never fell out of love for him something my friends noticed even when i was still stating we are only friends nothing more we went to a memorial for a dear friend of ours and a few weeks had passed before announcing our engagement i spoke with a mutual friend who was at this memorial and she told me how she could understand and that she could see it in the way i was looking at him and him at me it was in our eyes and that about sums it up doesn t it there were plenty of reasons to end the marriage but all has been corrected with acknowledgement and time and with that now we can move forward of course there are many who think i m on some pity romance and to them i simply shake my head and state you don t know me and you don t know us those are the haters that say that i know our history and know our present i m perfectly clear of what i can expect doug isn t well he has had a couple of strokes that doesn t make him any less of the man i love we go to brunch at this little place have been since we were first married there is this other man who hangs out there who had a fancy for me he seems to enjoy telling me that doug s only intention is to take advantage of me to never work and states that he has a problem with that and why don t i doug has worked over fifty years over fifty years of backbreaking work working freeway construction and owning a roofing company which included many years of performing his own tear offs which are brutal enough without the triple digit heats we have i do believe he has more than deserved his retirement and if i can give that to him damn it i will it has been over four years since i ve left him and i m finding myself everyday it s a daily trek for all of us don t you think but the journey continues on and i continue to learn oh i ll still continue writing as i ll still be finding ann macgregor who knows perhaps f a m will even get published share this share on facebook opens in new window facebook email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr share on x opens in new window x print opens in new window print share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on reddit opens in new window reddit like loading 3 comments hot digitty dog guess who came home posted on november 2 2014 by nora l pratt under journal entry journey of the month that s right i m elated with the warm feeling of love and cheer as i get ready for my beloved hour coming back to me it has been too long and so much has changed since we last saw each other i ve gained a bit of weight not that he will notice and i ve grown so much happier since my move up here to the foothills love this little town by the way but alas we will be together again for the time being until spring when we must say good bye once again i just love this time of year the colder days the changing of the leaves and the food oh my goodness the food and of course the decorating can t forget about that this year was the first in many years that i ve felt like decorating for halloween we didn t have many trick or treaters this year but my house looked good i can t remember when i felt like decorating like this i decorated for christmas last year but none of the other holidays just didn t have it in me this year i ve got oodles of energy it s a joy as you know i ve been seeing my ex husband again who knew that we would be at such a happy place he s suffered a couple more strokes that have affected his response time his speech has slowed quite a bit but his humor remains the same and that wonderful man i mentioned turns out he is truly wonderful and our friendship has bloomed into a wonderfully flirty romance so needless to say i m having a fantastic time and enjoying the affections of two glorious gentlemen there is something to be said about being wooed as it can truly get those pheromones pumping and cause a woman to feel deliciously feminine suddenly your walk is a bit peppier and your smile is a bit brighter your holding doors open for people and allowing people to go ahead of you in line the whole world is brighter i know you just threw up a little in your mouth right sorry i just feel so damn happy and truth be told i deserve this am i right it has been way to long for me to feel this damn happy and i m not going to question it oh and to add to the above i ve made up with one of my best friends and will be celebrating my birthday with her this week yep life is good speaking of which i turn the wonderful age of 52 this wednesday and i m not even upset about it i m excited about my new age and the years ahead of me i just know that there is going to be a great adventure coming my way and i intend to enjoy each an d every turn of this ride so hello my dearest hour welcome back you have been missed we have so much to catch up on share this share on facebook opens in new window facebook email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr share on x opens in new window x print opens in new window print share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on reddit opens in new window reddit like loading leave a comment counting my blessings instead of sheep posted on october 24 2014 by nora l pratt under journal entry journey of the month there are times in our lives when we realize it really does pay off to live with a partner or to at the very least have an emergency partner someone we can rely upon for heavy lifting help with heavy yard work or trips to the hospital the other day i suffered from one of the worst migraines in many many months i probably should have gone to emergency but how do i get there i m no longer in a community that has taxi cab service and really am not justified to call an ambulance so here i am with my dog tula who seemed very worried as she didn t leave my side all day and my cockatiel frank sinatra whose singing by the way i could have lived without then i got to thinking why of all the wonderful times in my life am i getting this doozy of a migraine now i m happy truly happy sleep has been a bit hard and i ve taken the advice of our wonderful bing crosby who sang when i m worried and i can t sleep i count my blessings instead of sheep and i fall asleep counting my blessings when my bankroll is getting small i think of when i had none at all and i fall asleep counting my blessings there is something very soothingly true in those lyrics i find that when i count all that i have as opposed to all that i don t i wake up with a far better view of my life true there is still so much that i want to fulfill in my life and so many dreams i wish to come true many of my dreams have i m singing and performing i ve connected with the local theatre and can t wait to audition or even work on their productions i m writing and researching a series of new novels to work on that will be about my family believe it or not i have a rich and luscious history dating back to 1634 so why these sick head aches perhaps it is the relief i feel as i m embarking on this new life they say that we can be so tense for a time that once we relax the blood vessels release and the migraine hits pow as i continue to count my blessings i m reminded that today marks kimball s birthday another milestone and as i start this day instead of the heavy feeling of grief i feel love and joy over having had this wonderful spirit in my life it warms me to know that that long winter of grief those cold foggy sometimes icy or sleety days months are now a season of the past i ve passed through that winter into spring and am now into the lovely warmth of summer with the wonderful memory of my dear sister warming my face i will be celebrating her life as i make her favorite birthday food this weekend and open her favorite bottle of champagne possibly an odd tradition to many of you but one that i find peace in as i do this to celebrate my mother as well with all the ugly in the world i love to be able to focus on all that is beautiful in life especially my life that is what is important after all i mean the way we can change the world is one thought at a time focusing on our blessings focusing on what we want as opposed to what we don t want the migraines will continue unfortunately however hopefully not quite as severe in future as i continue down this wonderful path of summer and content with the grass on this side of my fence happy birthday kimball i will forever love and remember you with all my heart through those old grounds of memory by emily dickinson through those old grounds of memory the sauntering alone is a divine intemperance a prudent man would shun of liquors that are vended tis easy to beware but statutes do not meddle with the internal bar pernicious as the sunset permitting to pursue but impotent to gather the tranquil perfidy alloys our firmer moments with that severest gold convenient to the longing but otherwise withheld share this share on facebook opens in new window facebook email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr share on x opens in new window x print opens in new window print share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on reddit opens 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