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this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels celebrate food nablopomo read just a little light reading on questions of sex gender and culture on why chick flicks are not all that woman friendly 7 popular chick flicks that secretly hate women be forewarned of some profanity on the federal court challenge to prop 8 and the broader related issues gay on trial winning quote they defenders of prop 8 who oppose gay marriage also argue that sexual orientation falls on a continuum and that sexuality is fluid a decidedly nontraditional view that has taken root in college queer studies departments but not the sort of thing you d ever hear from focus on the family s james dobson i d just love to see most conservatives who oppose gay marriage swallow that pill jessawhy s personal articles of faith a beautiful piece my articles of faith on the romantic paternalism prevalent in the church and the desire to be taken seriously romantic paternalism on the dangers of the twilight saga and a great example of why we should think just a little more carefully about the entertainment we consume ew moon why twilight continues to hurt america winning quotes young girls around the country are debating whether she should choose edward or jacob which abuse is better he s insanely jealous and stalks me or he can barely control his anger and may physically abuse me at any moment and the messages behind twilight be weak let your man protect you be careful don t get him angry if he hurts you it s your fault abuse is part of life accept it if he really loves you he ll try not to hurt you but don t be surprised if he does you probably deserve it you are nobody without your man so don t bother trying is it any wonder that the author of the series is mormon and to be balanced an interesting feminist defense of the twilight saga which asks some very important questions another feminist defense of twilight and my hero for the week the ten year old boy in arkansas refusing to stand and pledge allegiance because gay marriage is not legal therefore the nation does not provide liberty and justice for all no reading required just a fast enough connection to stream video go forth read and comment i d love to hear what you think posted by amelia at 12 20 am 7 comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels nablopomo read sex and gender 22 november 2009 accompaniment chocolate chaud 3 cups whole milk 1 3 cup water 1 3 cup sugar 6 oz dark chocolate i use one that s 80 cocoa break chocolate into small pieces i put mine in a baggie and beat it with my rolling pin very therapeutic bring milk water and sugar just to a boil and remove from heat whisk in chocolate until it is melted using an immersion blender blend the chocolate for about a minute until it is frothy if you don t have an immersion blender you can put the chocolate in a regular blender and blend it for a minute it s very yummy served with a toasted egg bread challah or brioche for example but it s best served as an accompaniment to decorating for christmas yummy posted by amelia at 10 57 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels celebrate food nablopomo 21 november 2009 projects i may be just a little crazy why because i m taking on projects when i should be doing nothing but reading but i stitch during church and i do need an occasional t v break so here are a few projects i m planning on in the next month or two for my baby c head bands for my nieces for my sister j in gold posted by amelia at 1 11 am 2 comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels make nablopomo 20 november 2009 winter i live in the wrong place you see i love winter i love cozy sweaters and wearing socks i love long walks through falling snow i love waking up to a world freshly blanketed in snow there s nothing like the silence of that moment i love hot drinks and crackling fires i love scarves and jackets and gloves there s really nothing about winter that i do not like yet i live in southern california and my sisters who both hate the snow live in utah and upstate new york this year i ll get my dose of winter when i travel east for christmas and i hope it comes with lots of snow complete with a snowman and maybe even a snowball fight just four short weeks and i ll be there in the land of winter yay posted by amelia at 12 28 am 1 comment email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels nablopomo seasons 19 november 2009 disco today it s only wednesday and it s been a long yucky wednesday so i m going to go to bed and sleep but first i thought i d show you what has me plugging along this week come sunday i ll be hanging ornaments including several disco balls and stringing lights and playing the first christmas music of the season and that my friends makes it okay that i had a long yucky wednesday posted by amelia at 12 10 am 6 comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels celebrate nablopomo ordinary 18 november 2009 excuses i ve been sitting here thinking about what to write about but the problem is that i got irritated by a man who i know to be an ass which means i really shouldn t let him irritate me so instead of coming up with something to write about for today i ve just been stewing so i m not writing tonight back to it tomorrow posted by amelia at 12 29 am 1 comment email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels nablopomo 16 november 2009 lose in the last year i ve gained nearly thirty pounds i think that surprises people when i tell them because i m tall and have a fairly well proportioned figure i carry the weight pretty well but it s still there and i can t wear most of my clothes i have exactly two pair of pants and three skirts that fit true i can squeeze into a few other items but not many and that is why i need to lose at least fifteen pounds though i d really like to lose all thirty because i simply cannot afford to buy a new wardrobe the only question is how i ve never had to really think about losing weight before the only time i lost any significant amount it just sort of happened when my lifestyle changed a bit this time it s going to take some concerted effort so here s what i m going to do slimfast for breakfast because a friend used it a few years ago and it worked for her so i m willing to ignore the questionable taste and try it exercising at least three times a week i should really try to workout daily but i know myself well enough to know that is highly unlikely i figure having a more realistic goal will not only make it more achievable but also less likely to result in guilt which usually triggers a defeatist attitude and the subsequent indulgence in sweets yeah i want to avoid that scenario in addition to working out i m going to try to walk more often i think the fact that i walked thirty minutes a day helped me lose the weight the last time cutting down on portion sizes i don t much buy into fad diets that stress cutting carbs or just sugar or purges or what have you but i do think that cutting portion sizes can go a long way cutting down on sugar intake i won t cut it altogether i like sweets and i ll occasionally eat them but no more snacking on candy bars from the college vending machine or making a side trip to get a cupcake cutting down on fast food it s just too easy to run through a drive through to grab a quick bite to eat this will be easier since i m relatively poor and fast food adds up quickly it s much cheaper to just buy the groceries and cook so there you have it my plan hopefully it will produce results and i ll be able to wear my jeans again and all my cute skirts and hopefully the slimfast will become more palatable this morning i drank the french vanilla in quotes because it tasted neither french nor vanilla with a diet coke chaser posted by amelia at 11 28 pm 2 comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels nablopomo ordinary post gender in the introduction to the most recent edition of the feminine mystique betty friedan argues that women s progress will essentially halt until our society makes changes in men s gender roles i couldn t agree more but i d like to focus my discussion of male gender roles on the possibility of women s happiness just for a moment recently mfranti over at feminist mormon housewives called attention to a little article in the mormon times which begins by asserting that feminism tacitly implies that in order for women to have worth they had to be just like men and ends with the pithy statement that it s interesting important stuff feminism i m just not sure why anybody ever believed it was the ticket to happiness let s start with these two lovely points and work from there first i a staunch some would say flaming long time feminist i have no desire to be just like men i m a woman thank you very much and i m perfectly happy being a woman even if i engage in a little g ender bending on occasion feminism has never claimed that women will only have worth if they re just like men even if it has claimed for women the same rights men have perhaps this subtle distinction is lost on palmer and then there s the question of feminism and happiness i m not sure anyone has ever claimed that feminism was a ticket to happiness either though i m sure most feminists would argue that feminism has very clearly allowed for more equal access to things that generate happiness but more on that in a moment aside from earning my scorn for its rather superficial and inaccurate treatment of feminism palmer s article got me thinking about the question of having it all contemplating the question of why it is after 40 years of feminism women are reportedly unhappy palmer proposes that said unhappiness is a product of the crashing reality that no matter what we may have heard and despite all our options we still can t have it all no matter what we choose it will inescapably come at the cost of something else now i m not going to argue with the fact that making choices involves cost if i choose to work full time i clearly will not be with my hypothetical children full time and vice versa but i maintain that there is a way for women to have it all including happiness and that s where men s gender roles come in i ll pause a moment for the head scratching and to continue so what does women s happiness have to do with male gender roles everything in a recent article examining gender roles in the workplace in the american prospect courtney martin argues that we have to stop using work life balance as coded language for working mom stress despite ample evidence that men are served by investing more time and energy outside the workplace and coming out as fathers while in it there are very few men who are taking on this issue in a substantive political way according to martin and i agree with her questions of balancing the demands of work and the demands of life have too often been framed in terms of women s needs which ignores that men too are human beings with lives outside of the workplace so long as we equate masculinity with earning capacity and the ability to provide coughcough i m looking at you mormons we ll perpetuate a situation in which women even working women carry the burden of making the home function while men just fund it aside i know this is changing because i ve witnessed it part of the change is simply generational but part of the change also needs to be conscious and proactive on the part of both men and women but this brings me to a point martin made in another recent piece in the american prospect it s not enough for us to identify what men should not and if my experience is in any way indicative do not want to be we and by we i mostly mean men need to develop a positive image of what a progressive enlightened post gender man is it s not enough to want to get rid of machismo and entitlement and patriarchy we need to have some sense of what will take their place it s tempting to simply say that men should be free to be themselves but is that enough simple freedom is that what the feminist movement earned for women in some ways yes we re now free to educate ourselves and earn for ourselves and become what we want to be we re free to make the attempt at having it all while accepting the costs that come with it perhaps the answer is that we need to open to men what has been traditionally available to women nurturing educating caring for children maintaining and designing and operating a peaceful productive living environment being the primary caregiver rather than the primary breadwinner these things need to be options for men real options that don t come with social condemnation attached perhaps most importantly we need a society in which individuals make choices for themselves about what works best for themselves in their own individual circumstances if we can reach a place where both women and men as individuals are free of gender constraints i have no doubt that we can have it all and happiness too because as martin points out neither heterosexuality nor fatherhood is a prerequisite for wanting a more flexible healthy workplace anyone who hopes to be a balanced person with relationships and passions outside of work has a stake specifically a stake in policy issues that allow for balancing all of the demands of life not just those of work in my mind this will take two radical radical as in of roots implying a return to roots changes especially radical for mormons 1 the breakdown of traditional male gender roles and 2 seeing people as individuals first rather than members of a couple perhaps i ll leave you there with the intention of following up on number two another time thoughts posted by amelia at 12 26 am 3 comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels nablopomo sex and gender society 14 november 2009 sir yesterday i buzzed my head again i was trying to wait until january so my sister could see my curls again when i go visit next month but i just couldn t handle the maintenance anymore and i didn t have the money for a real haircut so it was a set of clippers with a 2 comb my friend c her baby a on my lap and her three year old e throwing a temper tantrum with periodic breaks for conversation she was a saint to take the time to do it for me and now i have my edgy gender bending cut back i wonder how long it will take for someone to call me sir posted by amelia at 9 44 pm 2 comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest labels nablopomo ordinary sex and gender fantasy let s talk weddings specifically let s talk wedding dresses i grew up fantasizing about wedding gowns my sister and i used to buy bridal magazines with some regularity we d pour over them dog earing the dresses we liked drooling over diamonds dreaming of the day when...