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Text of the page (random words):
d they will be bringing home a very sweet little boy some time in the next couple of weeks posted by angi at 11 25 am 5 comments tuesday april 1 2008 miscellaneous ramblings see i am getting better about this posting two days in a row aren t you proud there are many topics to cover since i am such a slacker first and foremost our precious little addie can you believe that she is already 5 months old i don t know where the time has gone part of me is so excited to watch her grow and the other part of me wants her to stay this little and innocent forever a sure sign that she is growing up as of today she is no longer the youngest infant in her class at daycare i don t know why but that makes me really sad she has started eating baby food so far she likes bananas peaches sweet potatoes and carrots last night i broke down and tried some of the green stuff i m sorry but that just about made me gag well low and behold she liked it maybe that fact that she doesn t have my genes is good in this case meat and potatoes are more my thing but i have branched out some after 3 ear infections resistent to antibiotics in just 6 weeks we decided tubes were the right way to go we are lucky in the fact that i work for a major health system and that i work directly with the ent physician who did her surgery it really put me at ease to know what good hands she was in all in all she did good although coming out of the anesthesia was a different story she screamed for about 2 hours straight yes it just about broke my heart the day of the surgery she was pretty puny but the next day she was like a whole new child she talks so much more now yeah probably because she can actually hear it really makes me feel like we made the right decision addie is such a great child and is starting to develop such a cute little personality we could just sit and stare at her for hours and often do life has a whole different meaning now that she is part of it infertility will always be a part of my life sometimes it rears its ugly head when i least expect it as much as my life has changed that pain will always be there in some form and i will never forget what it is like to be in the trenches my pep talk for those of you still fighting the fight don t ever give up on your dream if it is what you want you will get there it just may not necessarily be the path you expected to take while i was always open to the idea of adoption i truly never thought it would get to that point we had decided on at least 3 ivf cycles of course at least one of them had to work two positive pregnancy tests of course one of them had to stick well we all know how that turned out everything happens for a reason i am now a firm believer in that october is a very significant month for us it is the month where i had my first miscarriage twins it is the month that i would have been due had the second pregnancy stuck and it is the month that we became a forever family when we brought our sweet little girl home what helped me immensely to get through the difficult times was to participate in a local mind body group that is based off of the book conquering infertility by alice domar phd i can t recommend this enough through it i learned to deal with stress much better than i ever had before and i formed an amazing friendship with two of the women i met in that class it helps to have other women close to you going through the same thing that you can really talk to cry to yell to vent to it is true that while people not having experienced the joys of if can be very sympathetic they can just never understand fully what you are dealing with i would have never made it through some of my darkest times without these two women to my surprise the leader of our mind body group contacted me last week and has asked my husband and i to come and speak to her new group about our experience with adoption wow how weird it will feel to be on the other side i remember so clearly sitting in their seats almost a year ago and looking at the couple that spoke to us wondering if i would ever get there while i do feel honored that she asked us i also feel that it is a great responsibility will i say the right thing will i convey to them that i do know how it feels i haven t forgotten what it s like what will they think of the choices we made or didn t make overall though i am very excited about speaking to the group i want them to know and see that there will be a happy ending wow i had a completely different direction for this post than where it ended up but again that is just one of those things if does to you i guess posted by angi at 9 29 am 5 comments monday march 31 2008 5 months old i really have to do better about getting these posts up i have good intentions really i do life just gets in the way sometimes being a new mom is so much fun but doesn t leave a lot of free time of course i wouldn t have it any other way here is our big girl posted by angi at 11 31 am 5 comments monday february 25 2008 my little lady last night we were shopping at babies r us for a friend s shower this weekend a very cute couple with their little gun in hand stopped us to debate the finer qualities of the diaper genie versus the diaper champ they were obviously going to be first time parents and both of them had that deer in headlights expression trying to decide what to register for my advice take someone with you who has done it before i would have never made it through that store alive otherwise but i digress back to the point of my story the mom to be was looking at addie and saying how beautiful she is addie is looking right back at her and giving that gorgeous smile of hers when all of a sudden i hear a very loud adult sized fart addie looked at me with a look of surprise on her face quickly followed by another little grin that said whew i sure do feel better mom to be didn t know what to say of course my comeback was see what you have to look forward to hunter would have been so proud posted by angi at 2 08 pm 2 comments wednesday february 20 2008 such a big girl addie grace is now 4 months old as i have said many times where does the time go she had her 4 month check up today and she now weighs 13 ½ lbs and is 23 3 4 inches long still under the 50th percentile for height and weight but she is growing steadily just a little on the petite side the pediatrician said she is just perfect which we already knew okay so we are biased she seems to learn something new every day she is rolling over now has discovered her little pigs is pushing up during tummy time wants to put everything in her mouth and is definitely developing her little personality more and more she loves her daddy and thinks he is just the funniest thing especially when they go on a drive can t wait to see what new and exciting thing tomorrow brings posted by angi at 3 40 pm 5 comments tuesday february 19 2008 addie s birthparents so i realize i left out a lot of detail about addie s birthparents when i finally got around to posting her adoption story but after the events of this past weekend i feel that i need to share more about them and how why we have now switched to an open adoption something i said i never wanted at our agency the adoptive parents typically meet with the birthmother prior to being matched which occurs prior to the baby s birth addie s birthmother ended up delivering earlier than expected so our match process happened kind of backwards when the email came out that addie was available all we knew about the birthparents was that they were a young couple 19 20 had been dating for approximately 2 years the birthmother a had taken a year off from college to work and save money and the birthfather j was working as a waiter and going to community college they both lived at home with their parents who didn t know that a was pregnant what don t you think you would notice that to their credit a only gained 20 lbs during the entire pregnancy and didn t know herself that she was pregnant until she was already 25 weeks again i find that hard to believe but i have heard that it happens at this point in their lives they just weren t prepared emotionally or financially to parent a child i admire them for recognizing that they weren t and for making a birth plan for their child a j had selected us from all the profiles that they had reviewed and the night that the adoption counselor called us to tell us we had been chosen hunter got to talk to j they had a great conversation and hit it off right away after the placement it was decided that we would have a belated match meeting with a j and that we would take addie with us at the time of the match meeting addie had been home with us for 2 weeks the day of the meeting i was so nervous i literally thought i was going to be sick i really wanted them to like us we met at a restaurant and from the time they walked up i just wanted to grab them both and smother them with hugs and kisses to tell them how thankful i was for the gift that they gave us the meeting went great and the conversation really flowed we ended up have a lot of things in common hobbies values tastes in music etc they were just the cutest couple but i have to say they seemed more immature than i remember being at their age although now i can chalk that up to nerves i offered to let them hold addie and it just about ripped my heart out to hand her over to them my heart was breaking for them i can t imagine ever giving my child away i know that our circumstances are very different and we have wanted a baby for so long we did get them a little gift a weekend away at a beach close by and we got a a necklace with an opal charm on it october s birthstone i mean what do you get for someone who has given you the gift of a life at the end of the meeting i was an emotional wreck but a held it together very well i was so glad that we met them and knew that i will be able to tell addie all about them some day in november our adoption agency hosts a potluck holiday gathering for all the past placed adoptive parents and current waiting parents it was a lot of fun and we got to have addie s first picture taken with santa the main point of this is to tell you sorry i tend to get long winded i think it comes from hunter that we saw our adoption counselor there who had a letter for us from a j it was so very sweet and talked about how after meeting us that they knew they had picked the right parents for addie they also included a s ultrasound pictures i still can t believe how incredibly thoughtful that was of them our initial arrangement with them was a semi open adoption which meant that hunter and i would send letters and pictures on an agreed upon schedule through the agency so that a j could have them if they chose i was never very comfortable with the thought on a fully open adoption i don t know why maybe it is the selfishness in me that wanted addie all to ourselves maybe i was scared that if addie knew her birthparents that that would somehow change her relationship with us i really don t know there isn t a day that goes by that i don t think of a j and what a wonderful gift they give us but beyond that i wonder how they are doing has a gone back to school how is she coping with the whole situation has her relationship with j suffered at all or are they still as in love as ever part of me really wanted to keep in touch with them and wanted addie to know how much a j really love her and what they did so that she could have a better life early in january our adoption counselor called to tell me that she had been talking with a and that she had requested another visit with us and addie she still didn t feel like she had closure my immediate thought was no addie is ours no one can take her from us but once that initial thought passed and i verified that legally even if she did change her mind there is nothing that can be done at this point i was excited at the thought of seeing them again that brings us to this past weekend and our second meeting with j a i wasn t nervous at all i was really excited i got addie all dressed up she had to look her best as soon as we saw them it was like running into old friends i gave them both a big hug and the conversation just flowed from there we talked a lot about addie but we also talked a lot about our lives they asked us a lot of questions about what we were like when we were their age and we in turn asked them about what their plans are and what they want out of life they held addie and called us mommy and daddy i felt very weird and comforted by that all at the same time they also brought us the sweetest gift a framed and matted picture of addie right after she was born in the hospital there were several tears shed by both a and i at this visit we talked about how we want to communicate in the future and decided that we did want an open adoption after all i don t really know what all that means right now but they do have our email address and a telephone number where they can call and check on addie and we can keep up with how they are doing as far as more visits i guess we will just play that one by ear addie will truly know how much we both love her and care for her and i think that through our love for addie we have a deep respect and love for a j as well i am so thankful that god has brought them back into our lives and really couldn t ask for a better situation i hope that if they do get married one day that they invite us to the wedding they will always hold a special place in our hearts posted by angi at 2 33 pm 6 comments older posts home subscribe to posts atom about me angi a thirty something and her husband who finally found their stork through the adoption of a beautiful little girl after several years of dealing with the joys of infertility view my complete profile adoption links a child s hope forever parents still searching a heart for adoption bee in your bonnet i thought unicorns were a myth in search of morning sickness not according to plan reproductive jeans road to adopt southern infertility stork found as good as it gets a few good eggs hopeful mother keeping the faith serenity now they grow in your heart unexplained infertility a bitch of a diagnosis our journey to addie grace october 30 2007 we picked up our beautiful daughter addison addie grace october 23 2007 the phone call we have been waiting for august 2007 live on adoption agencies website july 20 2007 first parenting class june 19 2007 signed with an adoption agency april may 2007 ivf icsi 3 bffn march 2007 taking a much needed mental break january february 2007 ivf 2 chemical pg damn stork december 2006 took some much deserved time off to enjoy the holidays and a few bottles of wine november 2006 fet 1 another bffn september october 2006 ivf 1 bffn august 2006 time for the really big guns january 2006 resumed injectible iui cycles november december 2005 took some time off to regroup october 27 2005 the stork decided it just wasn t...