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Text of the page (random words):
thoughts appear home 30 before 30 35 before 35 about thoughts appear october 7 2016 moment of truth no i don t actually want to be a vampire by thoughtsappear i told my husband he s never allowed to go business travel ever again ever because something always happens while he s gone that i am not equipped to deal with don t want to handle first the boys clogged a toilet another trip another toilet then the basement flooded a foot or so of water that s not even the worst okay technically it was the worst because stuff was ruined and it was expensive to fix the worst was a flippin bat in our bedroom in the around 5 am i wish i had reacted like this but no i reacted like this please just don t get in my hair i screamed i m don t want to be a vampire anymore a whisper scream because scout s room is right across the room from ours and waking the baby is never an option and ran out of the room i did pause to pull scout s bedroom door shut read motherly instinct to save the baby in my panic i did have some coherent thoughts such as vampires don t like light so turn on all the lights maybe the bat is bill compton and i can reason with him isn t a bat just a mouse with wings maybe esme kitty will catch it the answer is no my lazy cat will not catch it black cats don t catch other evil creatures because they re on the same team call dad yes that s right even women in their mid 30s need their dads sometimes then the bat flew into the living room i couldn t wait for my dad and i had to take matters into my own hands with a few mission impossible esque somersaults i made it to the front and back doors and opened them after 5 minutes of taking cover from a bat that didn t like ceiling fans and more whispering screaming from me the bat finally made it outside 13 comments tags animal eww humor life movies one hot vampire posted in ewww august 13 2015 fried green tomatoes by thoughtsappear in june i turned 34 and i realized i had less than a year to complete my 35 before 35 list i decided to start right then and there to continue working on it starting with 7 try fried green tomatoes but i amended it a little try fried green tomatoes while sipping a key lime pie martini completed let me know if you have any suggestions for my 35 before 35 list there are a few that i have no interest in anymore suggestions welcome 20 comments tags food key lime pie martinis life posted in food june 3 2015 the secret to time travel by thoughtsappear the other day i was driving by myself ahem i was in the car alone ahem it was just me no scout no kids period that never happens so i did what any adult that s been singing sesame street where is thumbkin and old macdonald would do i blasted some rage against the machine and some rob zombie and some punk music who cares that it was from the late 90s you do why because listening to that combination of music transports you back to the early 90s whoa excuse me how do i know i traveled back in time because i passed a billboard advertising that a different world was on tv some of you young people are saying what s a billboard some of you even younger people are asking what s a different world a tv show that was on in the late 80s and early 90s obviously i traveled back in time because i don t know why anyone would need a billboard for a tv show that s been over for 20 years so to recap listening to 90s music time travel you re welcome 18 comments tags humor life music tv posted in movies tv may 10 2015 the safest way to wish someone a happy s mother s day by thoughtsappear a few years ago i dreaded going out on mother s day miscarriages will do that to you people assume you re a mother and then you break down crying and the well wisher assumes all mothers are crazy and becomes sympathetic to norman bates or maybe you re like me years before that and have a boyfriend who takes forever to propose and when people wish you a happy mother s day your response is i ll never have kids anyways the point is there is only one safe way to wish someone a happy mother s day and it happened to me a few years ago other person you re not a mother are you you don t look old enough to have kids i looked plenty old enough to have kids but still best words ever then he continued other person well maybe next year i ll wish you a happy mother s day maybe happy mother s day to all you mothers out there and if you re not a mother yet maybe next year will be your year besides you don t look old enough to have kids anyway do you even have your driver s license yet 17 comments tags hope humor life miscarriage movies playing it safe posted in life may 8 2015 choosy dogs choose jif by thoughtsappear ozzy pups never used to bark at anyone at anything except the printer that one time then about two years ago we moved and the dog across the street barks every time someone walks by so does the dog next door and the dog across the street and two houses up so does the dog three houses up and the dog that lives behind us you get the point now ozzy barks when dogs walk by and almost every time someone comes to the door which is awesome when i m trying to get scout to sleep even awesomer now that scout is down to one nap that just so happens to take place exactly when our mail person arrives nothing better than seeing your little one s eyes flutter as you read them a story and then boom bark bark bark like i said awesome that leaves me with only one choice to sacrifice the peanut butter choosy dogs choose jif 6 comments tags baby humor life ozzy scout posted in baby older entries email subscription enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email email address sign me up join 14 2k other subscribers twitter updates tweets by thoughtsyappear facebook recent posts moment of truth no i don t actually want to be a vampire fried green tomatoes the secret to time travel the safest way to wish someone a happy s mother s day choosy dogs choose jif blogher 30 before 30 35 before 35 animal baby blarney blog blog crushes books boo radley brother cabana boy cancer cat causes chocolate christmas cookies crack cruise cupcakes did you just call me fat eww family fashion fitness food future husband greece halloween how i met your mother how to humor ice cream kiefer sutherland letters life love man vs cat marriage mars and venus mephistopheles miscarriage money movies movies teach us music netflix nyc ozzy people i want to punch in the face pete pod people pop tarts princess puddin pumpkins are gross quotes rants relationships ring scout sex snow special forces sports travel turbo slut tv vodka why i gain 5 pounds every winter wolf writing yogi castle chronicles you can buy my friendship with ice cream zombie blogroll jen e sais quoi accidental stepmom alone with cats blurt bluzdude clay baboons clay morgan cocktails at tiffany s confessions of cornfed girl does this make my blog look fat fear no weebles fix it or deal go jules go goodbye whoopie pie hippie cahier aka the hipster hoody hoo late to the party misty s laws nikitaland pearls and prose simply solo the aluminum foiled my plans the cheeky bride the flying chalupa the unabridged girl thy polarlife todd pack s messy desk tomorrow is another day subscribe to rss create a free website or blog at wordpress com subscribe subscribed thoughts appear join 14 223 other subscribers sign me up already have a wordpress com account log in now privacy thoughts appear subscribe subscribed sign up log in report this content view site in reader manage subscriptions collapse this bar loading comments write a comment email required name required website design a site like this with wordpress com get started