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Text of the page (random words):
r some soul searching figuring out of things on my own too would you look at that i ve decided i m not letting those thoughts hamper me from doing things the way i feel i need to do them regardless of who has anything to say this is still my space after all does that mean i m going to start posting every day week month again huh i dunno we ll see where things go from here all this being said to anyone who knows me on or off the internet somehow still manage come back here to stumble upon this post let me just say thanks but i m alright the majority of the stuff i write here is peppered with a healthy serving of hyperbole anyway so i m not as lost in need as i may appear on paper let me be the one to come to you seeking assistance it ll feel more special that way i promise posted by vinny c at 4 22 00 pm 6 of my homies said email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest filed under complaints nocial interaction rant tuesday april 27 2021 new beginnings i mentioned a while back about a big change that was coming in my life that was not only life altering but also adding to my feelings of being overwhelmed and stuck in place well i won t bury the lede anymore the thing is i m getting divorced yeah after almost 25 years of being a we we re each going back to being first person singular at least when it comes to each other i won t go into too much detail about how it went down other than saying it wasn t any one big thing that caused it it was just the culmination of a lot of little things and maybe a few medium sized ones being experienced by both sides that reached the point where it finally couldn t be ignored anymore and almost two years ago mrs c or as it stands the soon to be ex mrs c decided she had had enough and i had to fact the grim reality that i couldn t find a reason to disagree why two years well here in trinidad tobago you don t just decide you don t want to be married anymore run down to your nearest divorce attorney sign some papers and bam your marriage has ended i m assuming it works like that in some parts of the world but i could be wrong here the law requires a two year wait between deciding you want a divorce and actually being able to file for it so the nice lawyer lady still has to wait another two months to take the paperwork to the courts another few months after that they still give you time to change your mind it becomes official and then i guess i can remove that awkward soon to be prefix even after almost two years our minds are made up still knowing for so long that it s coming this isn t easy to talk about i only just started telling some people about it at the beginning of this year after we went to the lawyer to start preparing the process if anyone remembers the soon to be was a source of a lot of my posts we haven t talked about it but i took the decision to remove those posts the ones where she had most of the focus anyway and after this post i more than likely won t be telling any stories about our interactions anytime in the foreseeable future definitely not without her okay anyway we re amicable for the most part but i m not taking any chances i titled this post new beginnings because while the divorce signifies the a very sad end of a quarter century history it also signifies a new start for the both of us and maybe a chance to find the futures we couldn t find with each other that s what i m choosing to focus on instead of what could have been posted by vinny c at 11 57 00 am 20 of my homies said email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest filed under boring assed blog changes divorce i have no idea what i m doing news wednesday september 30 2020 stuck ever since i lost my job at the bank over ten years ago yes i m still talking about this it feels like i ve been stuck in the same place not physically of course i ve changed addresses about as often as i ve changed jobs in the last decade which is a lot mentally emotionally that s something different as we go through life we re constantly being told we have to reach some point where we re meant to change we re supposed to evolve into the us we re supposed to be at that point in our lives lately though an overwhelming feeling of stagnancy is leaving me feeling unsettled ironic much it s not like i haven t tried to move forward at first i thought i would just bounce back find a new job that paid just as well and keep things moving after it all happened naturally that wasn t the case instead it felt like it feels like every time i try to get back up off of the ground since then a new wave of shitty situations would just knock me back down and every time it did it was harder to get back up again little by little before i knew it i guess just stopped trying to get back up altogether naturally i ve been stuck financially too i haven t been able to clear off the debts i ve amassed during those banker years when i could barely afford to maintain them in the first place it doesn t help that new debts keep popping up that always take priority over the old ones it also doesn t help that my salary s gotten nowhere near what i used to make despite being steadily employed for the past seven of those ten plus years i know i know life happens shame on you vinny we all go through the same crap and we re all expected to pick ourselves up dust ourselves off and keep on fighting but when is it too much who decides that we haven t reached our limit yet now with another big change set to happen next year a life altering one in fact i m feeling the weight of this self imposed stagnancy i know i have to hit the marks i haven t even tried aiming at while i waited in vain for things to settle down not gonna lie it s making me feel a not so slight pang of desperation ironically though i think that desperation is what i need right now i hate that it even took feeling desperate like this to wake me up if you re not a super self motivated hustler go getter nowadays you re pretty much failing at life aren t you where s that ambition vinny where s your fire in all honesty i think i m ready to find it sorry but this big life altering change is not something i want to disclose right now i will in time all i ll say is it s not good news posted by vinny c at 9 50 00 pm 7 of my homies said email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest thursday july 25 2019 i ll procrastinate later in the fourteen or so months yikes since i last posted things have happened as they are wont to do things i meant to sit down and write about but lacked the focus needed to apply myself to the task incidentally lacks the focus needed to apply himself was a regular note my teachers left in my report cards back in the day some things you never outgrow sure i can make a lot of excuses as to why i didn t have time to blog tons of them i could talk about how hard things got with my slow crawl to a mass communications degree and how not getting enough sleep didn t really seem like a problem in my thirties but my forties don t like it so much i d just turned forty when i last posted and hadn t truly started to feel the effects at the end of the day though i just kept putting it all off that doesn t discredit the other things that have happened however for one thing school is tough on a working adult a lot of you can attest to this i reached the point where i suffered clear sings of burnout and developed a acute aversion to sitting down to do my assignments too bad you don t get to just throw your hands up and quit and still call yourself a proper adult i totally would have done that believe me so there was that but the main thing that was giving me an excuse to put off writing was the flood yup flood and i m not talking about a flooded bathroom again i mean a real honest to goodness house under water deluge coming down to the end of last october four days after our fifteenth wedding anniversary mrs c and i lost pretty much all our material possessions to a massive flood nearly everything we had accumulated over those fifteen years was gone after two days of freakishly heavy rain that left our community as well as many other parts of our tropical paradise under water for nearly two more days in our house the water got as high as five feet while others in other parts of our community saw as much as ten feet i can t say we were the lucky ones though be it five feet or ten if you live in a flat everything you own is toast soggy muddy toast alas poor adella i hardly knew ye mrs c and i weren t home fortunately the rain caused a traffic nightmare in most of the country and as a result we were stranded in the capital where we both work kawaii you remember kawaii right was the only one home and she was able to swim to safety and wait out the flood on top someone s pickup the little so and so actually came right back to our street the same day all the the water had finally receded and met up with us when we were finally able to get back in after several months and thousands of dollars however we were able to finally get back to some semblance of the life we had though we still haven t replaced the tv and dinner table in some good news i have finished with school without having to throw my hands up and quit by november i ll graduate and have my very own bachelor s degree not so comforting is the fact that nowadays everybody and his brother have degrees so to even consider myself marketable i ll have to jack back in and go for my master s later posted by vinny c at 9 08 00 pm 10 of my homies said email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest filed under i couldn t make this up if i tried kawaii me vs nature natural disasters school stress updates friday may 11 2018 let s just stop think about this i m not sure when or how but i ve become an over thinker the level of worry i invest into every little decision is astounding whenever i have a choice to make nowadays it feels like i can t move without weighing all the options and choosing only the best possible one even when i do decide i still don t make a move because i get hung up second guessing that decision until the last minute this is proving especially troublesome where my schoolwork is concerned right now i have three courses left until i graduate and they re all filled with choose your own topic or you decide on the angle of approach or both types of assignments it s safe to say i m a little stressed right now in fact i m not proud to admit that i m writing this post instead of doing one of those assignments because i just don t want to face it how did this happen i mean i guess there were always signs of this being a problem in the past but always did a good job keeping it in check i think while i ve always been a planner and hella methodical when it mattered at other times i considered myself an easy going kind of guy the kind who d just go with the flow and make decisions on the fly it s not to say i used to be reckless or anything quite the opposite now though it s like i traded all that for paralyzing indecision and self doubt it s not fun i ll stop boring you any further this right here as much as i d like to delve deeper into this i don t have the time right now that aforementioned assignment isn t going to write itself after all posted by vinny c at 9 34 00 pm 4 of my homies said email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest filed under boring assed blog doubts i have no idea what i m doing indecision school school stress friday july 28 2017 player ready mission friday mission type survival objective withstand workday assault difficulty level high player begins mission with reduced stamina and morale duration 8 hours mission rewards weekend includes end of workday mission rewards rest and relaxation weekend grants player bonus points to rest and relaxation weekend also grants player increased chance of earning high level rewards alcohol and doing something fun weekend also grants player the chance to receive rare classed loot sleep begin posted by vinny c at 8 03 00 am 6 of my homies said email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest filed under boring assed blog paint skillz phoning it in friday november 4 2016 snowball 3 moving man during my confession the other day mentioned getting my contract at work renewed this means barring any monumental screw ups on my part or an apocalypse or something i ll be steadily employed for at least another three years i m happy for this of course especially since my country s economy s driven by our oil and natural gas reserves and the plummet in oil prices last year has forced a lot of belt tightening and even some downsizing here and there so no complaining from me besides i mentioned what happens when i complain the last thing i want is to end up getting transferred to another division so why am i not only sitting at a new desk once again but also in a new building it all started when i got the call from hr to inform me that all the i s were dotted and t s were crossed and i was officially reemployed hr how soon can you start me is monday okay it was already tuesday afternoon so i figured i d give myself three more days of freedom hr no problem by the way you should know there are seating issues to sort out me hmm hr yeah the new executive lightning flashes thunder rumbles building shakes slightly brought some new staff in with her you know we have a new boss right me yeah i heard even if i hadn t it wouldn t surprise me we ve changed five executives lightning flashes thunder rumbles building shakes slightly in the three years i ve been there hr anyway we re short a desk in that unit now so you ll be another department until we sort out the logistics me probably would have been nice if they had figured that out before okay hr don t worry it s just for a week all things aside i wasn t going to complain the main thing was i was not returning to the ranks of unemployed and for that alone i was grateful i refused to sweat the small stuff that week finished quickly and before i knew it i was once again fastening my polyester shackle around my neck the shiny purple one my temporary place of abode was a department i knew a little about but never had much to do with one thing i did know was that they deal with major projects and had a lot of work the director introduced me to the team and let them know i d be squatting on their land for a few days i was given some busy work and mostly left to my one devices one week later i went back up to the executive floor as luck would have it one of the new people brought on by the executive lightning flashes thunder rumbles building shakes slightly had to go off on maternity leave so a desk was made temporarily available the plan was to rearrange the floor space and add an extra cubicle just for lil ol me so by the time she got back there d be no more seating issues it had put my pc in storage while i was away so i spent that morning ar...